20th September

Yo.

We're not the best that this blogging ting, huh? But when we actually do blog it's pretty good stuff. We rock. I don't think I tell you that I love you enough. I do. I love you lots. You're my bestie and you're fabulous.

So Brangelina are no more. It's so sad. Why can't hollywood types keep it together?! I don't even think there are any couples to look up to anymore... Oh hang on, that's not true. Anna Faris and Chris Pratt, Tom and Gi Fletcher and Dawn O'Porter and Chris O'Dowd. We can look up to them!!

Talking of Dawn O'Porter and my incredible, all consuming love of her... She has a new podcast called "Get it on" and it is really good. Yeah, yeah, I am obsessed with podcasts, whatever. It's her talking to another "celeb" about their style. It is a really good listen. The latest one is with Jason Segel, he seems like a really lovely chap.

I am sooooooo excited about seeing you. And yeah, it has been a while since we've been out!! Weddings and hen dos don't count (mainly because I was pregnant for yours) so it must have been 2011 at least!! That is NOT cool dudette. We are shite at this!! So as a result, expect your time to monopolised by me at the ball. I am sorry (I'm not) but it is only fair.

I am very emosh at the moment and worried about the next few months. I know this time of year will be hard and I am sure it is the same for you. Today last year was when we went to Center Parcs for the first time and Eilys was trying to roll over and she was nearly sitting unaided. Honestly it hurts my heart to think about it. I have such vivid memories of encouraging her to roll in front of the sliding doors in the center parcs villa and being so super proud of her and then she just stopped when we got back. I feel guilty because we joked a lot that she couldn't be bothered and that she worked out that she'd be on her tummy and didn't want to roll. It all stabs and makes my eyes sting. A big part of me is still very much in the "why her?" stage because you know, why? She was loved and she was so wanted and other people don't love their babies and don't want them (and I in no way want this to happen to anyone else but you know, why Eilys?) Sorry. I am just rambling.

You are right though, there is a time for wallowing and that time is now I suppose.

Anyway I am going to *try* to make Dylan nap (oh god, he NEEEEEEDS a nap today)

All my love and shit

Yo' Bestie

P.S. by "love and shit" I mean love and stuff not faeces xx